You'll Thank Me Later...

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The change in weather has prompted me to return to hot Caramel Macchiatos as my drink of choice. Over the summer, I forgot how much I love the foam mixed with the caramel sauce mmmmm....pure love!

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My newest ridiculous idea includes helping to start a "makeup abstinence program" to help women clear up their skin. Phase 1: Detox... hahaha. (Confession: This began as a joke, but everytime I tell the story I get a new idea and in my mind it has turned into a full fledged business plan, complete with infomercial worthy testimonials.)

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Met another "big brother" at the pool yesterday.... awkward.

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It's coming! The Tattoo and body art expo! The world's largest.... classy, Chicago.... classy!

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I may have belted out a curious rendition of "I will always love you..." at our GRIP retreat. ;) It felt like summer camp all over again. Embarrassment in front on the group. Check! No, for real though it was totally fun.

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Walking past the counselors office yesterday I heard a group of them making jokes about liability insurance.

Talking to Boys

Do you ever do something embarrassing enough to block it out of your memory for most of the day and then as you lay in bed that night feel compelled to get up and blog about it since your roommate is sleeping and it is making you seriously laugh out loud? Right now I am experiencing that phenom.

If you know me at all, you would agree that I have trouble with peer relationships- it takes me some time to ease into them. I do not do well with small talk so I have a rough time just mingling with people I have met for the first time. (NOTE: mingling is much different than schmoozing- I am very good at schmoozing.) Add to that personality disorder, my complete lack of filter and nervousness around men (particularly "chunky peanut butter" kind of men-those who are bearded, bald, sweaty) and you have yourself a recipe for disaster. O the disaster that is my life sometimes! :)

Last night at the GRIP retreat (which I will blog about in coming days as I process it- in summary though, AMAZING!) I played a game of Apples to Apples with people I didn't know or didn't know real well. Congratulations on being outside of your comfort zone Rach! Besides the time I randomly asked a man if we had the same phone then said nothing else the rest of the game to him, I did pretty well. A fun time was had by all and I ended up winning the game.

This morning at breakfast I sat next to the cell phone twin man. He very kindly started a conversation by offering kudos for winning the game last night. Suddenly I morphed into Steve Urkel and responded, "Thanks. Yeah, it was pretty amazing. I went back up to the room and made myself a crown last night!"
AND YOU'RE DONE!

Two crucial questions spring to mind:
1. What was the crown made out of?
and
2. REALLY?!?!?!?

I may have also drawn attention to the impressive amount of crumbs and poppy seeds all over the table surrounding my plate and forgot to say "thank you" when passed the cream cheese. awesome. Needless to say, the man found new friends by lunch.



*** Songs that could play here: "You ain't seen nothing yet... ba.ba.baby!"; "I'm a hazard to myself!" ; "Maps- they don't love you like I love you"***

The Gospel Truth

Last night was training for the SLAM program I am volunteering with on Monday nights throughout the school year. It is an awesome program and thankful that friends introduced me to the ministry. As the trainers were talking about discipline and why they set up the rules they do, I saw a glimpse into some bigger context for where these kids are coming from. So many stories they shared were similar to experiences I have had with "our kids" who have been coming over all summer and into the Fall. It was exciting in some ways for me to know that this guarded nature is typical and found myself overwhelmed once again at the privilege it is to be a part of their lives, to be a voice to their hearts.A few days ago, Heather, D'Shawn, Vincent and Enosha came over. Vincent came running into the house and gave me a big hug and said "Rachel I missed you!" At the time I was like, "Missed you too buddy!" and kinda kept right on hanging out. Laying in bed that night, reviewing my day though I remembered the exchange and had this sudden realization of just how special that is. He trusts me and knows that I love him. Seriously, these kids are a gift and I pray that they realize the Lord loves them even more than I do... which is ALOT!

One of the GRIP Volunteers gave a testimony about some kids that he mentored who eventually came to Christ. It was not an easy abbreviated experience. It was a sacrifice and required His constant dependence on the Spirit, but it was so sweet to hear that these young men had tasted eternal life! Sitting behind a desk all day worrying about problems like bed bugs and roommate fights, I guess I kinda forgot how electrifying the POWER of God unto Salvation is! This is the really real, folks!

Kaitlyn and I somehow started talking about Calvinism and Arminianism at the end of the night. We talked about what each school of thought believed and why and some of what we believed. It at no point was a heated debate, but it did bring back flashbacks of Moody and how sometimes those discussions were not very productive. It reminded me that we can "know it all" and yet if it doesn't make us more like Jesus than WHAT IS THE POINT?

People should know God's love and hear God's truth because it's for real! Why would you settle for being a clanging cymbal when there is so much more to the Gospel? Being right is not enough to change lives, to give joy, to bring freedom... Only Jesus can do that! I'm so thankful He did that for me....

New Olympic Sport: Carting

I tried to complete a simple task two days ago: grocery shopping.
In the city you have to be a little more creative about transportation than at home, but I am up for that challenge. The flawless plan was to walk to Jewel and bring along the handy cart from my Grandpa so I did not have to carry all the groceries back.

Here's the thing:
I got down on the street and could not figure out how to unfold this wire cart. I pushed and pulled and kicked it a few times, but to no avail. I would calmly lean against the brick of the building and wait for the crowd of people to get beyond me and then start my intense attempt to dislodge the cart. 15 minutes later I sat defeated and pouting on the stoop with no plan. Kaitlyn arrived just in time and saved the day- who knew that turning a cart upside down is an effective method?

So, with cart opened I was now back on track. A little later than I had hoped, but still in the plan. The walk to Jewel was very pleasant. I saw a couple of "our kids" on the lawn at Moody playing frisbee with their "Big Brothers" and thanked God for men in these boys lives. I had seen them earlier at the pool too. Somehow they can get whatever they want from me... I think I agreed to a pizza party at report card time! As I was getting out of the pool (you know that awkward moment when your suit suddenly becomes a suction cup and you realize you have not shaved in far too long?), one of the "big brothers" introduced himself. (Note: This is not the appropriate time to make small talk) I politely chatted with the bro, holding the boogie board just under my chin so as not to draw attention to how uncomfortable I felt meeting a (half naked) man for the first time in my suction suit, while dripping wet.

About an hour later; my hair still wet, and blocking out the entire poolside meet and greet, I passed the boys and their big brothers... with my cart... on my way to Jewel... to simply... grocery shop. I knew from the last time I had taken this cart to Jewel that you do not use it for putting items in it while you are shopping. Since it is made up of wide wire grids, it does not hold the groceries well unless they are bagged. Flashback: me joyfully manuvering my cart around Jewel. A woman stopping to inform me that I am "dragging my milk on the floor." Me looking back to see my 1/2 gallon of milk wedged between the floor and the bottom of my cart and then a trail of groceries from the dairy section to the deli counter that not even Hanzel and Gretel would envy. Bottom Line: It is merely a transportation tool. I know that.... now.

Here's the thing:
If you have a transportation cart and also need a shopping cart... how do you cart both? Well, after the dragging of the milk experience (DOTME as it's come to be known); I had noticed that people would put the transportation cart in the shopping cart and then at checkout would unload one into the other. Perfect plan! I tried to do this, however, my transportation cart is bigger than most and was hanging over the long side of the shopping cart. It was knocking into people. It was scaring children. And would you believe it... it was knocking over an entire salad dressing display? I recovered as I (somehow) always do and despite all the obstacles, I finished shopping in pretty decent time. The store was crowded and everyone seemed to be checking out at once. The lines were long and me and my two carts were feeling impatient. Instead of waiting in line and having some nice woman named Greta bag the items I purchased and figure out how to fit them all into my transportation cart...... I decided self checkout would be "quicker."

Here's the thing:
I don't even believe in self checkout- it steals jobs and the machines always seem to beep at you anyway or be out of something or require some kind of assistance. So normally I would avoid them, but for some reason I went there to check myself out. As I keyed in the individual codes for each kind of onion I bought and tried to make the machine believe that I really had bagged the last item (even though the PARTY STRAWS did not change the weight of the groceries much), a line formed behind me. A long long line of people who just wanted to pay for their bottle of AZ iced tea and gummy bears. They waited while I explained to the machine that I did not need assistance because the "unexpected item in the bagging area" was just my knee trying to keep the overflowing amount of groceries on the little sensor thingy. They waited as I tried to fit every bag into my transportation cart- a higher level of jigsaw then some can appreciate. I think they cheered as I took my receipt and tried ot manuever both carts at least to near the door where I could drop the shopping cart off. They waited just a moment longer as I accidentally ran into my ankle with the fully loaded transportation cart.

I will spare you the details of lugging the cartful of groceries up two flights of stairs. Suffice it to say, that as every other moment in this shopping escapade- it was PAINFUL.

Peapod. I bet whoever invented that, tried shopping once with a transportation cart.

7 Things Lighter than Meatloaf

Lately, my blog has been really serious and heavy and thoughtful.... like meatloaf. Tonight I was just reminiscing on all the funny things that have brought moments of relief in the midst of that and thought I would share them.

1. Question: who sends a sympathy e-card? It's a real category...

2. Today I saw a firetruck parallel park today. It took 2 firefighters with coffee in hand.

3. A friend and I went to a "world dance" performance. It turned out to be a school dance performance with the theme of ABRAHAM LINCOLN. I wish I was kidding... they were dancing to a narrator reading quotes from Abe's journals. They called it an "original composition" but I feel like our pal "honest Abe" is getting cheated.

4. As I am walking out of Solheim, one freshman says to another "....so then I said to him, 'Do you know why I love you so much?' And then I was like, "Because the Bible said to love your enemies' (laughter). " A shower of "Oh snap" rained from the other guy, as if it was the best burn he had heard in his life!

5. A man came in my office to ask a question- a simple professional question. He had a bunch of facial hair and I became overwhelmed by it all. I started sweating... always a bad sign for me and then my mouth went on strike. I was just uttering syllables and could not blend them into a cohesive sentence at all. How embarrassing!

6. Kaitlyn and I found a plant outside by our dumpster. Kaits had a vision for more green in our apartment, but I just wasn't seeing it. (It was a rather large plant) SO..... instead we decided to give it to Joe from "our beautiful neighbor." We wrote a note being sure to include how attractive we found his calves (it is after all his favorite muscle) and just like a solid bunch of Jr. Highers.... the rejection hotline. We were very "sneaky"- even disguising our handwriting. hahahhaa. It was great! We even documented the event.


7. Just tonight I discovered the literal video version on youtube. It has made my life infinitely funnier (similar to when I found those wedding videos). Here are two faves.... Enjoy!

Lil Surprises....

Pete and Repeat were in a boat.
Pete fell out.
Who was left?
REPEAT!

This joke should have been placed at the end of the last post. All week I feel like I have been having these profound emotions only to discover they are the same as the day before, and the day before that... different characters, same fears and confusion...waiting to be reckoned with. Why is it that inner turmoil is so patient? You would think that it could be a slacker... you would hope, but it's not.

Yesterday however the LORD showed me His hand in such silly ways; ways that would only mean anything to me. And in the midst of my inner turmoil, I tasted a bit of relief from the Hand of the Almighty... just enough to keep me from giving up...just enough to keep me laughing.

Silliness #1. I found an "M" in my shoe. No really- that's all. There was this little, fabric "M" that felt like a pebble in my shoe. When I took it out, it made me laugh and gave me a whole lot of "scope for the imagination." Instantly I had a hundred stories bombarding my head about where this may have come from and why.... Was it a coded message? Was it from a secret admirer? Was it actually a W? Is it a clue to a murder mystery? Did it have something to do with Asher Lev? And of course there were more but I will spare you those. I told one of my co-workers the story and he said, "So?" To which I responded..... "Yeah, I don't actually know why I find this so amusing, but I do....I really do!" I still do.

Silliness #2. A friend who "I absolutely adore" (It Takes Two quote), sent me one of the best presents ever. Sunday, Scott Krippayne led worship at Lil Liz's church in Grand Rapids, MI. (That sentence contains so many things I love!) If you don't know who Scott Krippayne is- you should be embarrassed, but know that you are not alone. Some hints that may jog your memory: sings the "I'm not cool, but that's OK, My God loves me anyway" song, played at the Frankenmuth music fest 6 years ago right before Selah, 2 years ago his song was chosen for the American Idol winner victory song, he rocks my face off. If all that is not helpful at all you can always look him up on itunes. haha. ANYWAY... Liz talked to him and took a video of him and sent it to me.
TOTALLY LOVE the double thumbs up and the incessant waving.... I bounced in my seat and showed everyone that came into my office. It's really amazing how 15 seconds of Scott Krippayne talking changed my mood. He really is so great! You should check out his music. "Deeper Still" is favorite.

Silliness #3. Last night Weight Watchers was rough. I gained for the second week in a row... not alot, but nonetheless pounds I had already worked hard to lose. That was disappointing and close to depressing. In the instant I stepped down off the scale, I decided to go to Jamba Juice for dinner. hahaha. Such a "healthy choice" I know. On the way down Michigan Avenue, my hands in fists, I tried hard to keep the tears from spilling over the dam. I tried to tell myself things that were true.... but they didn't feel very true. I spotted Donald from a distance- at first annoyed that I would have to be social. Donald asked me how I was... and I gave him a short summary, "Weight Watchers went bad just now. I'm probably gonna cry. I'm fine." How's that for preparation right? Bless his soul for being such a good hugger. That's really what I needed. What foolishness that in a city this large I would run into a friend on Michigan avenue!

Confession: The funky 90's tones of Scott Krippayne's latest album are washing over me and these lyrics caught my attention. "Help my heart see this as another way to be close to You. Remind me this is more than just a mountain; it's soon to be a story I can tell of Your faithfulness. I will not forget." Super need to remember that... I am compiling a "booty" of stories of God doing His thing, being just Who He said He is. So thankful for all the silly lil' surprises yesterday!